Self care is often proselytized about as bubble baths and manicures. Those definitions work to a certain extent. Really, though, self care is taking care of yourself. The deep work of self care is taking care of yourself by doing the things that you fight resistance about.
Between you and any goal or ideal version of yourself you want to achieve you will find resistance. If all of our depression, anxiety, debt, clutter, obesity and addictions are any sign, we are all battling resistance.
When we overcome resistance, it’s a deep form of self care.
For example, let’s say you want to lose weight but you can’t get yourself to workout. That’s resistance. That’s not taking care of yourself. That’s not honoring your commitment to yourself and the version of you you’re striving to become. Taking care of yourself, self care, means doing that workout.
Maybe you want to want to get out of debt but you find yourself struggling to sit down and create a budget. That’s resistance. You might go take a bubble bath to avoid the budget, but that’s not self care. Self care is showing up for yourself. Doing what you need to do. ANYWAY. Regardless of the resistance.
In fact, use resistance to guide you on self care. If you find yourself resisting going to apologize to your spouse, recognize why. Improving your relationship is actually taking care of yourself. Allowing negative emotion and habits to win isn’t. Right? If you find yourself avoiding the gym or avoiding creating a meal plan or avoiding organizing a closet, recognize the resistance. Then take care of yourself.